Fun with SiteMeter

Every now and then, my friend Fritz (coughJoeycough) plays a fun little game where he highlights the funny things that people search for that bring them to his blog. The search terms are as racy as you might expect.
 
Recently, I've gotten some hits from people looking for a combination of the words "sex," "sister," and "little boys," which is pretty effin' creepy. Someone even got here by specifically looking for "best friend's sister fucked me," which, of course, is amusing, but I'm sorry to report that I'm not much of an expert on the subject. I'm positive, though, that there's a site out there for just such a niche. Keep searching. 
 
So I decided to add nail-polish remover to the fire and see what other poor, misguided, possibly lawbreaking souls I could lure here by playing this little meme game:
 
What 5 phrases will guarantee your blog gets twice the normal amount of hits tomorrow?
1. Paris Hilton sex tape
2. Free iPods
3. Signs of the apocalypse
4. Tom Cruise crazy gay
5. War on Christmas