THIS JUST IN: Lesbians are HUMAN! says 'Tennessean' reporter

Ralph Loos, apparently just a simple hetero caveman blogger for The Tennessean, lowered himself into the seedy underbelly of a Local Lesbian Bar^TM for purposes of "research" Saturday night:

Perhaps I could learn something about social interaction by observing sytems other than my own. We heterosexuals think we have the best “hunt and gather” method on the planet. But what if we don’t? These are things I needed to know.

Apparently Ralph thinks that these elusive lesbian creatures go about dating in a completely alien manner that has, I surmise, heretofore been hidden to him because he has had no need or desire to pay any attention to members of the species who aren't open to having sex with him. And, while the High-Vulvar Lesbian Elder Committee decided many years ago that the community should drop the whole late-night-dancin'-naked-and-fat- around-the-fire-chanting-'Death-to-willies' mating ritual, it had never really caught on in this generation anyway, because everyone is too self-conscious for naked cavorting and chanting.

But it's all good, cuz Ralph eventually assuages his skittery audience's fear by assuring us that despite their important function as society's extreme Other, lesbians is good people.

Did I learn anything about dating at the lesbian bar? Time will tell. Their system of romancing seems pretty similar to our’s. They’re good people.

Thank God Ralph stumbled into the Local Lesbian Bar^TM to clear that up.

HT: NiT

INSTANT UPDATE: I don't mean to imply that observing the dating techniques of various groups of people is not a worthy topic of inquiry, because obviously there is sociological value to it (though I guess you could argue about to what degree). My beef here is with the tone of the piece — the wilfully weirded-out hetero man venturing into that scariest of territories to him: A place where the women won't fuck men. It's sad and typical and pathetic and, frankly, played out.