Fun with spam

Once or twice a year, I dip into my Gmail spam filter to see what nonsense has been blocked from my inbox. It's usually a disappointing jaunt, fraught with messages containing naught but Chinese characters and penis-enlargement patch testimonies, but sometimes you get a gold nugget of absolute random weirdness, and you think, Wow, who gets paid to sit around and string these words together? Because I happen to think that might be somewhat of an awesome way to spend the day.

Behold this message I got hawking some Canadian pharmacy's products; the body of the e-mail was the following gonzo poetry, while an attached image advertised the pharmaceutical wares:

Abruptly a stone caught his heel and he stumbled, breaking his eyes
away from the dark horseman. Specifies whether incoming calls (from
other DTEs of the CUG) to this link are barred. ImTOO MP4 Video Converter 3. TXT Description not available RHYTHM.

The "properties" menu item should possibly be on the "View" menu
instead of the "Tools" menu. I'll hold my tongue, but I will not - I
dare not - help you. To tell thee whence thou cam'st, of whom deriv'd, Were shame enough to shame thee, wert thou not shameless. But the daughter is ripe for
marriage and the guest is a bachelor.

I'll hold my tongue, but I will not - I dare not - help you. He could
smell the trees and the trodden grass. Four of them are called 'Cardinal' virtues, and the remaining three are called 'Theological' virtues. Nikitsky knew he could not kill a man with impunity.

Perrin very nearly groaned. As the two approached, the taunter saw
them and waved. The sky was clear. Smartwheels use sonar, laser rangefinding, and
millimeter-wave radar to identify mufflers and other debris before
you even get honed about them.

These identifiers are, in effect, reserved except as described in the
following list. Abruptly a stone caught his heel and he stumbled,
breaking his eyes away from the dark horseman.

You have nothing to say. Pomysl sobie - kazde zycie musi sie kiedys skonczyc.
I've run into many problems with PropertySheet - it always seems to
come down to doing things at the right time. And now it's all different.
Batard retreated, for twenty feet or so, with a fiendish levity in
his bearing that Leclere could not mistake. I am using my PCMCIA Modem further on.

I Googled bits and pieces of this to see if portions were cribbed from famous works. I found some of it here and some of it here, some of it here and some of it here. Looks like a bunch of stuff ripped from Wikipedia articles and online books. So, ostensibly, someone sat around and culled all this stuff from online sources, adding a bit of personalized spam goodness to round it out. Amazing.