Peter Panic

The Great Peanut Butter Recall of 2007 has left me largely unaffected, thanks to my lifelong devotion to Jif and my more recent devotion to not stuffing my piehole with peanut butter at all.

However, my cubemate at work said he woke up the other day and saw the story on the news and just happened to check the jar of peanut butter in the pantry and sure enough it was stamped with the dreaded "2111." He brought it up to the office yesterday and joked about how he was carrying a chemical weapon.

Turns out his roommate had had the jar for a couple of months and just recently opened the jar and eaten some. And guess who's been really sick for several days with a mystery illness.

Today my cubemate came in and said that last night someone paid him a hundred bucks to eat a spoonful of that shit. And that crazy motherfucker did it. He showed me the twenties.